Going into parenting I thought I was going to do such a great job. I was the "good one" growing up and everyone said, "you'll be a great mom." I would try to "humbly" say thank you but inside part of me was like, "yeah I know," and the other part of me was terrified of failing. Quite the perfect storm in side me. Well we had our first. There isn't much of what I would consider parenting that first year just a lot of keeping them alive! Right? Well, once our first born made it to the terrible 2's and wasn't so terrible that was it! The part of me that "knew" I would be a great mom got puffed up and decided I was amazing. Then #2 was born. From the get go things were different. He was black and blue on arrival because he came out so fast! Seriously. When you refer to a boy as a "bruiser" that our second. Started crawling at 5-ish months and ever since hasn't been to concerned with making sure I feel like I'm a good mom. For a long while I have felt sorry for my self. Just being real here. Who did God think he was to give me a strong willed kid and messing up what I thought of myself. PRIDE PRIDE PRIDE. God is so gracious to give us what He knows will be to our benefit.
Our second kid is 5 years old. I have gone to God most days of that 5 years and begged for help or complained but just in the last three weeks I have said, "what do you think of my kid." What is your perspective on this strong willed thing. He has answered here and there but just this morning I got a glimpse of something truly helpful.
Romans 12:1-2
I appeal to you therefore, brothers,[a] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. 2 Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
GOD IS STRONG WILLED! Seriously, track with me. We are made in the image of God right. The things about us that look like God if not surrounded are usually our greatest weakness as well. Like, God is a God of order, I love to be orderly but if I don't keep that good characteristic surrendered to God it will turn into order-zilla! There will be no room for mess, and all will be perfect all the time with no wiggle room. My kid has a strong will. So does his heavenly Father! God has a good, perfect and pleasing will and we are so thankful for it even though we don't understand it all the time. My kid has his Father's characteristic in this area. That is a good thing. What I GET to do as his parent is keep introducing him to Jesus so that he can one day surrender this part of how God has made him and God WILL use it for His glory. Maybe this is really simple but its a perspective that helps me stay calm when in yet another battle over behavior. The term "strong willed" just lost all its negative connotation that the world and even the church has put on it.
My prayer for my husband, myself and every other parted of a strong willed kids is that God would grant perspective in the little years. That He would give His unconditional yet firm love for our kids to us and that we would parent more and more the way He does.
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