IDENTITY MUG

     Usually when I sit down to write I feel like I am coming out of my skin over an amazing truth that is rocking my little world.  This morning is different I have a sober joy.  My heart is calm and I desperately want to be able to articulate clearly the concept that God is teaching.
     Recently in the bible study I am in we have been going back over each section of our life and noticing God's work in it. You might think that would be really fun and it was until I got to age 11. That tender age when I loved my life, innocents and joy was abundant and then I was molested.  More than the physical the emotional and mental aspects of this experience have been what affect me to this day.  God has healed much already and I am so thankful for it.  He has even used my testimony in other girls and women's lives.  There was more work to be done.
     I have been sharing on FB about this new adventure of scripture art on canvas that I have been blessed to do.  I was encouraged to sell something that has aways been an extension of worship in my life.  It has been sooo much fun.  The business is called Abide Scripts.  I had a showing at "vision caster's" house last weekend.  I really wanted to honor the Lord with our time together so through much prayer I decided to share my testimony, sing an original song and lead some worship.  Just go on and share all my gifts at once.  As I prepared for sharing my life story I was asking the Lord what is the point of what I am to share.  The point I hope I got across was this.  When I was 11 a terrible thing happened to me.  In the after math I came away believing that God was good just not good towards me. That I was not worth protecting so I had better hurry up and do what it takes to be worth His love.
     Suggesting lies to our private thought life is something the enemy has been doing since the garden. Challenging God's love and care for us.  If we don't know who God is and who we are to Him we can't hold the purpose He has created us for.
     Its like filling a mug with boiling water and a tea bag to brew and it having cracks all over it.  Not only can the mug not hold hot water long enough to get a good brew, but if someone was to pick it up they might even get burnt.  There is still some tea brewed in this cracked identity mug but its not producing its full potential.  In like manner, what we believe about ourselves and God is how we will behave. How we behave determines our quality of life. I want some good tea!
     Yesterday, I sat down with my Mother in Love for some encouragement with Homeschooling Troy. Basically we are getting the work books done but not having any fun and this is not the experience Paul and I talked about creating for our kids learning.  She asked me one question, "what lie are you believing that makes you think you can't deviate from the work books?"  Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I burst into tears.  I am afraid that I'm gong to screw my kids up because I'm not good at academics.  I am afraid to trust God to equip me to do what He has called me to do and do it His way.  This may seem like a random bit of story but it ties in with the lie I have been believing that " I LACK."  I lack being smart, I lack what it take for God to love me...and so on.  So it was time to believe the truth.  I left her house with a challenge to do business with the Lord about my identity.  I also got to leave all my kids so business was fast in a car all by myself!
     This is when God gave me the visual of the mug.  I told Him out loud as I drove, "Ok, I get it, my mug is cracked!  How do we patch it up?"  So gently He said back to my in my heart, "No, stop. We are not patching. I am giving you a new mug."  My entire being froze in peaceful surrender.  "Yes, Lord that sounds good!"
     Several scriptures of who I am in Christ came to mind but the great part is I went on and believed them!  This is so much more fun than believing the lie.  God used one of the canvases I just did to speak to my heart. Ps. 23 "The Lord is my Shepherd, I LACK NOTHING! "
     I snagged a $1 mug to make myself a visual.  I planned on painting it black and writing my identity on it and filling it with what God says about me.  This morning I thought I'm going to look up what my name means.  I thought it meant wealthy.  I looked it up and it said: Rich, God beholds!  For a girl that has believed I wasn't worth looking after to know that I am beheld by God is some sweet healing.
     Ok, so now I pass on the challenge...are you believing any mug cracking lies the enemy has suggested to you lately or in your past?  Do you need a new mug completely?  Let brew some tea!

This was the canvas the got me!

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