One and Done.

Therefor we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 

Heb. 12:1-2

     There is so much rich truth in this one very long sentence.  The part I would like to share on is the bit in yellow.  I have been newly impressed and a touch depressed with the idea that I am such a sinner!  I have been diligently lately to keep my precious extra time that I have to myself, in the World of God.  When all three of the babies are occupied through out the day I have been listening to sermons.  The pockets of time are not always long but with these smart phones I can listen to a sermon while its quiet and hit pause when its not.  All this to say the more I am in the word the more clear cut my sin is.  I am grateful to see my sin so clearly and have to constantly remind myself that when I see something new or something old again I am under no condemnation.  The goal is to see it, confess it, do what ever needs to be done to make it right and move on. 

     For the first 5 years of parenting I was shocked that my kids needs continually changed. I have to confess I was also put out by it.  I had no intention of continuing to grow my whole life. I wanted to simply get it right and bask in my perfection.  Absurd I know but when I got habitually frustrated with the change I found this was my secrete rotten heart's desire.  An idol if you will.  The same has been true for myself in my walk with God.  I want to get it right and be done with the whole mess.  I'd like to be perfect and not deal with this sin issue ever again in my whole life! 

     Since this is not the reality of the human experience my desire now is to bask is thankfulness that I even see my sin and have been given the power to not choose it.  Laying aside the weight and the sin is such a privilege.  Is it work, yes!  But, it is a work that is made lighter with the perspective that it is profound grace on God part that I get to run this race at all. 

     How does this affect my everyday?  Well, my every day is spent with 3 little sinners and a chocolate lab.  I have been given the duty to train these babies up (ages 5,3,1 1/2).  I find myself at times...well most days being disillusioned with the same problem.  I want to train my kid in a manner that Paul (my husband) calls "one and done!"  When I am focused on my own comfort and desire (idols) for peace and obedience I get frustrated that my kids aren't getting in line with the plan.  One and done!  I teach you once and we shouldn't have to teach it again.  What a double standard when my Lord has patiently walked through out my life with me teaching me to trust and obey time and time again. 

     Lord, help me cast of the weight of my idol and the sin of worshiping them instead of You.  Help we raise my babies in the same manner that you continue to raise me. Consistent, gentle and full of grace.  I pray that if there are other Mommy's that read this blog that struggle in this area that you would strengthen them to lay aside their idols and cast of the sin that entangles them.  To run after you and bring the babies with them!  We love you Jesus.  We need our existence to be abiding in you to produce the fruit we desire to honor you with in this life!  Amen.